Note to me! heat + humidity = tremors

This morning I woke up and I leisurely, made my way to our porch where I peacefully enjoyed a cup of coffee.  What a great way to start our days viewing our beautiful pond. Even more enjoyable when my husband and my children get to join me.

Just like most days I am rushing to get the errands done, soon I become aware that my legs aren't feeling normal.  They begin to feel weak and begin to shake. A shake that's not visible to anyone, but I can feel. Hanging the last peace of clothing on the line I can feel the summer heat turning up it’s power.

Thinking to myself; "I dam well better get my arse in gear so I can get what I need today before these legs get too shaky !” 

I have come to take pride in the old way of living. Where the woman looks after; the house, the food, making meals clean cloths and whatever else the family may need. Even now fighting my monster, these daily chores are high on my priority list to try and keep my life to the normal living we have had over the years.

Experiencing these tremors, reminds me that I have to put my physical needs first on my daily priority list, again. I need to start exercising, walking and myself first and my day. That way it’s done and out of the way.  The weakness and tremors only get worse as with heat/humidity. I know in the past with being in better physical shape, this weakness and shaking wasn’t as bad as today. 

To my surprise I came across an article on my Facebook news feed explaining this exact thing. Ataxia Tremors it is called. Reading it it backed up my own theory that I, was not getting enough activity before our heat wave have came….. if I had been more physically prepared I would not be experiencing these Ataxia Tremors as bad. With out it being visible to others, I feel I was luckier then others out there that have more problems that come with this symptom.   

Oh, yes! I knew I was going to struggle to complete my errands,  rushed to get everything done and return home before it became visible to others. I have always tried to hide what I feel and whats doing on with me, even before my diagnoses of Multiple Sclerosis. 

I always try to be that strong woman the community all looked upon, before my illness, not that it really matters. It’s a thing I try to do so I don’t get the pity response from everyone…….   

On this day with the  humidity quickly came the anxiety.  It started as I slowly walked up and put my stuff so the cashier could ring my things through. I don’t know why the anxiety started as I knew this girl and often chatted to her on a friend level.  She kinda gave me a funny look , like as if to say, "oh! She's having a bad day. ....it's ok, we all have our bad days.” , then smiled noticing that I was much slower then any other day and not quite myself. She didn't comment or say anything as I felt she was trying to ease  my pride and it was ok to me. 

I started to choke up.... I was trying not to say much.... 

I was thinking to myself; " At lest she knows that I have MS and  I am not drunk!  ...Dam you MS, for trying to do this to me !!! ……… 

I felt a lump in my throat get bigger and I began saying to myself; "Don't you cry!…..Don’t….. cry! Dam it don’t you cry! …Breathe…"

I know if I did cry , this poor young lady would want to say something….just hoping to ease the awkwardness, I could feel that we both where feeling. She is a very ….. kind soul.

I just wanted to get my errands done  that day and beet this "bastard" inside of me. He’s not just playing with my body he often plays with my emotions…..to get the attention I refuse to give this bastard within! 

Most people in our community know that I often keep to myself and can be stubborn. They also know that if I am bad enough and need help, that  I will  ask for it.  Just as the other symptoms we with MS have, the anxiety and the tremors are both are not visible to others at this stage, for me. I must say; "I am happy for that." 

When I got back home, I pulled out my phone and retread that article about Ataxia Tremors!  Wow! Yes I need to get back at being more active and get on top of my health with diet and exercise! I will do what I had done before….. start with walking!!!

So I am going to go back out in that heat and walk laps around my cool pool. I am going to drink lots of water remain positive …... I am going to get that Monster back in his box!!!  I will enjoy the summer and sun today! Just I'll do it MY WAY! 

Thanks again, 

Remembering summer living as a child in the Almaguin Highlands area ofOntario

As I sit here on my porch overlooking my view, I must say I am loving the sounds of summer in August! The birds, the frogs, the fire-flies, crickets and best of all, until dusk ......... NO FLIES!

My Front Lawn!
Photo by; MS and Living Life -Sherry

As pleasant images flash through through my visions in my mind, I smile, feeling a lump in my throat.  Knowing now,  how my parents gave us a gift that can never be bought, nor forgotten. Reminiscing some of my best childhood memories of growing up living on the Forest Lake River, in the Almaguin Highlands area of Northern Ontario.

Photo by; Josh & Carrie Gilson-Arra Sunset on the Forest Lake River, Ontario.

We moved in the country, when I turned 5. Although  we lived about a 10 minute drive from town.  I remember,  my brother and I complained that our friends lived to far away. When I got older, it was an hour plus bicycle ride over hills and around corners. and often once I got to town, I turned around and headed back home! It was just a long enough bike ride that our friends thought it was too long of a ride to head out to visit us.  Looking back now, I know ..... it was a good thing living a good distance from town.  

So needless to say, it became a time in my life, my brother was my best friend..... for he was not only my bud, but teacher and mentor, I looked up to in many ways. He thought me so many things; from spearing pollywogs with his bow, hook my own worm, how to catch fish, when I tripped and fell, to pick myself up and keep going..... respect others, protecting not only those who couldn't protect themselves but most of all, to love, protect and defend myself. He was always there for me then, when I needed him.  Sometimes, maybe I was a little too aggressive, but I learned how to show others, where my boundaries where. Now looking back, to me that was a good thing!

Photo by; Jessica LaPorte
Lilly-Pads on the Forest Lake River, Ontario.

Although it was a time my brother and I where close, I often spent time to myself.   Learned there where people out there that could hurt you in many ways....But that was okay!  I learned a lot about myself; what I liked, what I could do and thought of a life I may have when I grew older, as we all do. But, this was a time in my life,  I really started to enjoy the country life and all that it offered. I began to like myself and most important of all..... I, felt safe. 

Canoeing the River
Photo by; MS and Living Life -Sherry

Yes, this was a time in my life, it was all about planning out; my next canoe adventure through the lili pads, seeing beavers, calling loons up to our dock, wondering how close I could get them to me before they realized I wasn't their mate.( I know......how mean of me, eh?) *Smirking* .  

Photo by: Sherry MS and Living Life
Sunset of the Forest Lake River, Ontario. The island. 

Oh, I can't resist not to mention that often, I tried beating my record of how many times I could swim around the island I front of our house. I was a strong swimmer at this time and often believed I would become a lifeguard!  (But thats another story for another time.) I had my own competitions of how many frogs I could catch from the canoe in the Lilly Pads and then let them go. I even remember teaching some of our southern friends/visitors, how to catch frogs at night along the river-side and causeway, then having a frog leg fry.  At that time, they tasted like chicken to me, now not so much!

Oh boy how our property and the river itself,  really gifted our family with great memories and of course the best sunsets ever!

I now know why my parents moved from down south to raise a family in Northern Ontario!

Photo by: Sherry MS and Living Life
Sun Set of the Forest Lake River.

What was your best memories of August and this time of year, when you where younger?  I would love to hear about them by email or in the comments bellow.

Remember, enjoy life and .... "It's never too late.....

Health Update…a MS monster is blindfolded.

It is now 5 years since my diagnoses or Multiple Sclerosis, MS.  My treatment, each day I self inject a needle to help control the damage that can be done if or while I have a relapse.  The damage is unseen to the eye but is seen through an MRI.  When looking at the MRI, they look at many factors and previous damage the daise had done to my brain or spinal cord, which, these are called lesions  which apparently look similar to tumours.  They compare the current images to previous images,and measure lesions to determine if these are; growing, multiplying, shrinking or can test to see if they are active.  

Growing or multiplying means the disease is causing damage done to the body, which usually the inject a die to see if it is active.  Shrinking….. well, most doctors don’t believe it is something that happens, but have heard of it over the internet boards. .

Well, it has been confirmed that did have two relapses this past winter by my specialist, however the MRI that I did have last month showed them that they where pseudo relapses. Thus, meaning that I am going through the motions of a relapse but it isn’t doing any permeant damage to my body. In other words it is not progressing!  Good news! The injections are doing their job!  

Even though the motions of the MS Relapses is not only tiresome but also; draining.  Often, getting vertigo, feeling extreme fatigue, confusion, pain, brain fog…. numbness, lack of coordination anxiety, and depression.  Often causes loss of; memory, vision, body functions and ability to move one or more of your limbs. Not only this but we tend to become house bound and withdrawal from society, friends and family. Sometimes, others do not understand our withdrawals and take it personally. 

This experience can  be extremely scary not knowing if these functions will partially return or fully return back to normal. These bouts of attacks, on our brain and spinal cord, can last from days to a week to even months at a time. Only with it “the Monsters’ ” choosing, of what it wants us to loose and for how long. Which is why I call it the Monster within.  No one can see what we are experiencing but can only notice some of its  side affects it does to our functions.  When the Monster decides to lay still, only then will we gain our abilities and functions.  

If the monster manages to get through and cause permeant damage to our nerves, chances are we may never get it back.  Even though the brain is capable of redirecting signals  by making new connections, the spinal cord can not.  

I hope this helps others understand a little more about MS, Multiple Sclerosis. I will not give this monster a NAME, as it gives him too much time, energy and attention it doesn’t deserve.

Wishing you good health… and happiness.

Image from   http://www.viewphotos.org/canada/images-of-Guelph-178.html

Photos Blindfolded bear near Guelph, Ontario, by author copyright Marilyn Whiteley

Restaurant Review of The Bistro, Sundridge, Ontario

My First Restaurant Review!
Bernards Bistro as the locals call it "The Bistro"

We where invited to accompany my son and his small family to a restaurant located in our busiest business section of our small village, of Sundridge Ontario.  I place I had not visited since it opened. Keep in mind, I do not go out to eat much do to my restrictions I have put upon myself to improve my health. I did feel compelled to share with you what a wonderful place The Bistro is.

Even though it is set back off the Main Street, it is well worth the visit, not only is it clean, staff is very welcoming and friendly, but you get the an amazing view over looking Lake Bernard. You can choose to sit in doors or on the screened in porch, either one is wonderful.

The menu had a wide range of food choices that any family could not only choose from but could afford.  In addition a list of desserts of homemade baked pies and cheese cakes.

 Our table ordered  their; Fish (Haddock) and Chip Dinner, Seafood Platter and the Chicken Strips.   They came with homemade fresh cut fries and you could opted out the fries for a healthier choices of Caesar or Chef Salads if you choose.

The Fish, I say was for superior and the best fish I have had in a long time.  The tastes makes my mouth water as I write, thinking of the thinly battered coating and the moistness of the fish itself.  To me, it was perfectly cooked. Our party also enjoyed their seafood platter that had the fish and shrimp.  The chickens strips was also moist in delicious. Later, test tasting the Strawberry Vinaigrette Dressing, made me wish I would have opted out for that and the Chef Salad instead of the fries and gravy . Don't get me wrong, the fries to where wonderful and filling, I just usually do choose the salad, and seeing the salad it to looked very appealing. I just wanted to treat myself with a little meal cheater and had the fries.

The sitting arrangement was very comfortable and with others in the same room we enjoyed and could hear each other comfortably, even with light music playing in the background.  There was a nice fireplace lit and seem to set the atmosphere.

I am defiantly looking forward to returning to this new found restaurant nestled in our own town. Now, finding this great place we wont have to dread that drive to go to well known franchise restaurant out of town because in my opinion, this meets it standards if not higher.

This is a reflection of my experience and opinion.  Please take the time to visit the Bistro (Bernards Bistro) and I look forward to hear about your experience too!


Please view and visit the Bernards Bistro on line
To view Bernards Bistro; Mike Kelly.


Thanking you for your reading and wishing you good health.

MS and Living Life...

The MS Alone feeling has shown his ugly face.....

Yesterday I had an experience that made me realize how alone, I really am. It was a hot day to begin with, and we had stopped to visit family. There home was hot and had humidity where taking their toll on me physically and cognitively. I needed to leave an cool my body down and fast! All I had in mid was to get to my pool and dive in to that cool water. The nabours where our side enjoying the summer day. Hubby asked to stop and say; "Hello and have a quick visit."  All I could think and say was; " No, get me home to that pool!, We can come right back!" We hadn't seen them in sometime and yes it would have been nice to visit but the heat was killing me! I felt bad for not stopping as we waved.  It may have seemed selfish of me thinking back, but I was so hot.

Quickly diving in was such a relief to my body and mind as the cool water  surrounded me as my deep breaths exhaled the heat from with in. I could swear my body created steam  like a hot iron rod hitting the water.   Like I remember in my younger years, being on the farm as they branded cows, seeing that red hot rod hitting that water and the steam simmering. Giving me that “Awwwww”, feeling. 

In the past, he aways said he understood the heat thing and that it was ok, I had to do what I had to to keep my body under control of this monster within. After returning to the pool with a dress for coolness and ready to head back up to see our nabours, it became clear that really in all reality, he didn’t understand. As, he was upset that they had already left and we then had to stay home.  I sat for a moment, thinking what to say to point out his change in attitude.  “I softly said, I am sorry I got MS when I did. I didn’t ask for this, nor did I ask for my life to change so much. I wouldn't wish this beast on my worst enemy.  Clearly, you really don’t understand what it is I feel and am going through.” He admitted that it was true. He doesn’t understand.  Wow Truth Bomm

I feel bad for him because I do know no one asks how he is doing anymore and get on with things. People are always asking how I am doing and concerned for my wellness. It is nice of them to be concerned and feel its easing his burdens. But truly I think

 it leaves him feeling alone with his own struggles of life and how to deal with my illness.

Our life has changed and turned on a dime since my diagnosis May 24, 2010. We have been together for 28 years and have built a beautiful life for ourselves and our children, now grand children. Life as we had seen in our hands, it is no longer there but a pile of ashes running through his fingers like the sands of an hour glass.  Not knowing what to do next. 

Its a loss and I understand we are going through a grieving process while trying to build a new life and new goals but knowing nothing is certain, promised to us tomorrow.  We try and live day by day with this and what the monster is throwing at us. Only feeling the monster within isn’t only  trying to control my body but how my life will be lived, believing he, the monster, would love to have that battle just between him and I. 

I know I will not be those people we use to be.  It’s all about the people that we become.  I continue to read/listen to a lot of self development books and stay positive. Sharing this information with him that I learn.  I may have had to start over but I am liking the person I am becoming.


Thanking you for reading and wishing you good health.

MS and Living Life...

My 1st Book Review

Those who know me well, know that I enjoy reading, I preferably and absolutely love audio books.  Not just any type of books like; Romance, Fiction, Biographies but they must be self development and self improvement.  Something I can learn from.  Something to better myself, my way of living, health or how I deal with others, in a positive way. I don’t like to sit and reed books as there always seems so much to do and enjoy.  If I am going to sit, I want it to be to relax and let my mind be at ease, bye watching a movie or sit at my computer to each out to others around the world or to share my thoughts. I look at my life as we all have a certain amount of time given to us, and we must use it wisely. So audio books are my way of multitasking, getting the job done and educating myself at the same time. 

MSandLivingLife

Women Who Love Too Much. When you keep hoping & Wishing He Would Change.  

~By Robin Norwood

A book I never would have thought would profoundly change my outlook on myself and my life.  It really touched home for me. This author shared stories of different level of abuse and dysfunctional relationships within there homes and with friends around them and how they where being controlled and affected.  

These women where from all levels of society, who loved their partners, regardless of their unhealed issues. Leaving them feeling that they can fix and heal their partners if only they could do this or that and get them to see and change. Though all their anger and addictions it left so many feeling alone, hurt and feeling they didn’t do enough. Blaming themselves. Some women not even realizing they are in abusive relationships. Some how I could find some similarities of my life and past relationships and the things I tried to do to control the out come of some situations.

Later the author shows you that we need to start with ourselves,  To heal our own wounds and learn to love and treat our selves in a loving respectful way, using this as an example to others around us.  We need to learn to believe, love ourselves and get in touch with our own inter-voice. Become responsible for our own well-being and be confident in ourselves, so we don’t fall pray to these kinds of relationships and people in our lives.

I learned that by my own standard I will not except to be treated any less then I treat myself or others. I am not responsible for anyone but myself in any relationship.  How they act or react is not my choice or under my control. Others are their own person and as an adult they are very much capable of making their own choices, good or bad. That they themselves will experience the consequences of their actions. We as people can not control others but be there to listen and be there for them when needed. 

I believe by following this and living it, my relationships and friendships are stressful for myself, not only more open, enjoyable but richer and fulfilling. 

MS and Living Life...

Download the Audio Book

Vegetable Tip

Remember to cut your greens off of your vegetables before you store them. Keeping the greens on depletes the nutritants from the vegetables. The greens can be then used in salads, Stirfries and morning smoothies! We need to eat to create new healthy cells.

MS and Living Life

Can Infections Cause a MS Relapse?

After searching the internet it took me a very long time to answer this question.

Can Infections trigger a MS relapse?

So, I made a short video in hopes it will help others get this answer more quickly!



Please feel free on commenting! Your input is greatly appreciated!!



Love Sherry

~ MS and Living Life ❤

Extreme Emotions with MS ❤

Recently I have been absent from social media, not because I was wanting to but I have been playing  my own super hero personality, my MS Warrior with fighting another flue bug.  This time a bad sinus cold which had turned into an infection.  Not just in my sinuses I have left it and it went into my inter ears as well. 

Normally, for people who do not have MS, you would go to the doctor and they would give you some type of antibiotic to clear up the infection and you would rest and get better.  Well those of us with MS, well its a little more complicated.  Not only do we go through this process but, in addition, the infection wakens the MS Monster within us with vengeance! Fighting with the force that can through us into a s flare-up or even a relapse.  Relapses can be so severe that can possibly cause us permeant damage.

Our immune system is already fighting and eating away at our good cells and tissues. Once the immune system realizes their is an infection it kick in to a higher gear eating away all cells good and causing us to have a flare up. Meaning the immune is attacking everything in our bodes and our symptoms become active announces its presents physically and mentally. At this time, this is not only felt by us but seen the affects to others by looking upon us.  Slurring speech, dizziness= staggering or bumping into things, memory loss, not able to carry on a conversation, become very weak. Not only do I experience this but I get a brain ache. Yes, it isn’t a headache.  our hearing and vision either diminishes or becomes oversensitive.  I also could hear my eyes blinking in my interear. Similar to hearing your heart beat when you have a high fever.

A few days into my antibiotics, thinking I was getting somewhat better and needed to get outside for some fresh air, I decided to wander down the street to my youngest sons house. If I needed a ride home, I know he, our family and his friends where there and knew they would drive me home. 

I was pleasantly greeted by my granddaughter, Ashley, almost 2 years old now.  She was running toward me as I walked slowly up their drive as she yelled; “Nanna! Nanna! Nanna! Nanna here!” Which made the short journey worth while, just to experience that and a big hug from her as we met. 

We ventured to the back of the house to join everyone talking and visiting.  Within a short time I was feeling over whelmed, and felt an unexplained urge to cry. What the heck is going on I thought, as I was trying to hold it back.  

Within moments my husband asked me if I was alright, explaining I didn’t look well.  I said I don’t know.  Think maybe I need to go home….. and I started uncontrollably started to cry.  Everyone became quiet and turned to look at me .  I said I don’t know whats going on? … 

I don’t know why I am crying? …. I can’t help it!! I don’t know whats going on??? and i cried more!!! 

Extreme Emotions and MS

Everyone looked at me wondering what the heck was wrong with me? You could see the look on their faces. I could feel and read their thoughts; "Everyones enjoying themselves and she’s crying? What the hell?”

I quickly through my hands in the air and explained it must be my MS because of my flare up, I don’t know why I am crying? I am happy to be here? Ashley just made my day.  I am so thankful I could walk here, its not that far but…….Its got to be my MS cause I have done this laughing too? Sorry for crying I explained, the uncontrollable laughing is more inlighting and funny to see!! 

My son, the clown he can be, and caring for me, starts walking over to me.  As he hugs me he says; “ Aw, Mom, we all love you, you don’t have to cry, we understand, your just so happy to be with us!”  and laughs braking the ice.  Everyone starts laughing!  I begin to laugh and cry at the same time….quickly everyone started in too.  Oh, how I am thankful my son has a nack to make an embarrassing moment something to laugh about. 

Looking back, I choose to see how this as benefited not only me but those around me.  Even thought they don’t always see what the MS Monster is doing to me, they can gain some understanding of what I am going through.

This will became one of my great memories.  Similar to the time we where at a funeral for an older family friend. Right in the middle the eulogy of a well known, respected community member of our small town, I broke out laughing and couldn’t stop! People looked on with discuss and some with humour. Some began to giggle. 

Later the family asked with curiosity, what I was laughing about?  I was very embarrassed. I explained that another friend had called us and had somehow locked himself in his garage and we had for got to go let him out.  It really wasn’t that funny.  But now, looking back on it, as it was before I found out I had MS, it was a sign,  or a symptom of Multiple Sclerosis.  

And, just maybe our friend who passed, wanted to give his family something to laugh about at their sad time?

I never really thought too much about these extreme emotional outbreaks I would have, until after my diagnosis.  The news of my diagnosis up set many in our small community. So much so some would later come visit me and offer their help if I ever needed it.  Remembering one supply teacher I had in grade school.  She had taken over the class when my teacher had to take a leave of absence do to an MS Relapse.  She explained to me she now understood my emotional laughing out breaks I would have in class.   I don’t remember doing this, but do remember I tried to be the clown in the class so I could get out of doing some of my work.  Not understanding why I was doing so good in school one day and the next I couldn’t read and had to relearn!   

So, sometimes as playing super hero and playing an MS Warrior with this Multiple Sclerosis monster, we can not control the things the monster triggers within us, but we can turn the experiences into something positive and allow us to laugh at it.  By choosing to see the positive from my experiences, I believe it helps me realize so many blessings I have in my life.  It helps me realize how important it is to look after my health; distressing, getting enough sleep, eating healthy and getting the right amount of exercise is important. But a Must! 

I am learning my health must come first ,above and before all other things , to keep me healthy.

I thank you for taking the time to read about my experiences. 

With all my love, MS and Living Life.

Tuesday Motivation

Tuesday Motivation; Start where you are, use what you have, do what you can! Little by little you will see improvements! 😊 

You can live a positive life with MS!

I believe you can live your life with Multiple Sclerosis with a positive attitude.  My experience is when I am positive things go better.  Just think about research.    We need to educate people to let them know MS is manageable!

As yourself; Would more money be given when you put out a positive look on life and how you manage it?  

Kale and Quinoa Salad

Soooo good! Yummy! 500 calories! 

Quinoa, kale, onions, tomatoes, olives, extra virgin olive oil, Italian spices & Sea Salt ! Seen s picture in FaceBook and I had to have it! 

Having all the ingredients and being healthy and all! All follows the Dr Wahls Protocol Diet for MS ! 😄 
another WahlsWarrior meal! 

Karma and Handicapped Parking

Yes I use a handicap permit "WHEN my Multiple Sclerosis is flaring up causing my legs to hurt or weaken when walking distances due to the heat or extreme cold. Which  can even cause my body to shut down. At other times I will park a far distance from the entrance for others also can have closer parking. This will give me the exercise I need to maintain the use of my legs and fight other symptoms of my MS. 

I have even had a man wave his arms and swear pointing at the a #handicap parking sign in front of my car. Although he fails to look in my window for my permit! But for some, that doesn't matter when you look like your total normal healthy person on the outside !

Often I would like to stop and talk to these people who make me feel ashamed of using this parking and explain to them what my illness is. However, usually this is at a time where I really don't have the time or energy to stand out in the cold\heat to explain my circumstances. I have very right to that parking as anyone, anyway! I realize I use to be that person at one time too just not as rude! Oh God, how Karma can bitch slap you in the face! 

Often I find myself still  pulling out of a parking space, I sometimes I feel stares, see rude gestures and people talking and pointing as I ignore their judgemental behaviour.  Even after 5 years I find myself quickly pulling my handicap permit out of my dash and putting it in my glove compartment so no one can see it when it's not in use.  Thinking; "Girl,don't lower yourself to their level by making an ass of yourself.  Just keep going. You have an illness that currently is invisible to others. You know on these days, your come backs and explanations just won't come out right anyway. ..... When they know better, they will do better!  Then I find myself looking up out my sunroof saying ....Thank you for that Maya. 

People who miss use handicap parking really frustrate me too! It is sad how  society  today is getting very cold, bold, uncaring and judgemental in today's world.  So many seem cranky and miserable. Often I hear sighs from impatient people, seeing scowls and cold stares at others in stores, waiting in line or in aisles.  Some just rude and lacking  common courtesy for others, young and the elder. Like really???  Your life is that bad? 

You really should take some time out and chill! You can't say excuse me or help someone with their cart. Maybe help them with their items, even at the check out? Instead of standing watching and rolling their eyes? If you don't like something in your life that much that you feel the need to be so cold and uncaring, maybe you should change it?  Don't take it out on others! Remember; "What you put out you get back!"  

I always say.... For those grumpy people out there that have missed treated me, I hope God\or higher power, lets me sit back and watch his karma work! Just as he has done to me with this parking issue. 

Boy how I see things can change how we look at things when we are in the other side. This illness has taught me more then what the illness can do! It has thought me not only how others can cause so much hurt and pain but how to; set boundaries, raise my standards, forgive, love, to be a friend, to listen, give without expecting anything in return,  compassion, to care and to except others for who and what they are. Also to change the things I can change and except those things I can't change. 

Most of all its thought me that I can do anything I set my mind to and to believe in myself and the strength I am capable of.  

MSAwareness Month March 2015 

Image from http://cliparts.co/printable-handicap-parking-signs

Why am I withholding my diagnosis of MS?

I have been contemplating on letting it be known and freely voice that I have Multiple Sclerosis, MS for sometime now. I have come to realize that I have become a quiet person and withdrawn myself from society.  I am the same person I have always been. I have had this monster living within all my life. I have kept quiet at times because I am was ashamed or in denial of this stigma of the disease itself. Withdrawing, I feel it has been due to dealing with the impact of the reality of the diagnoses and the fears of what comes with that.  I have learned being diagnosed with MS is not a death sentence but a life sentence that just needs to be managed to substance my quality of life.   The fear of the unknown.

Fear is a liar that crushes the dreams and lives of many.  

Some of you probably have noticed, I have moved my  original Facebook page even and tried to leave MS behind me.  At this point maybe little bit of denial and being labelled with the stigma of becoming wheelchair bound.  I have tried to barrie myself in; fitness, health and wellness only to learn I keep coming back to this dam MS monster. I am learning no matter what I do, everything is affected by it, good or bad. The great thing I am learning is how to control this beast within.  I am learning what he likes that gives him strength and what he dislikes that give me the control I need to live my life.  

I hear and see others that are battling MS, pleasantly, many with great success. Everyone had their own journey with MS.  Each one of us are different and experience things differently.  Which is why they also call it the “SNOWFLAKE DISEASE.”  

Why am I withholding my illness? Hell, I live in a small town and it isn’t like everyone here doesn’t know anyway!  When I got ill  the bad  news traveled through town like a raging fire.

Like they say:"Bad news travels faster then good news these days!"

How would I ever feel I could hide this kinda news? LOL After all, I was the second lady in town who got her A-Z drivers license, the first woman was not retires.   As if that didn't get me known in this mall town but I was not only a Heavy Equipment Hauler but also an Operator!  In the early 2000's, that was not seen in this northern small town as it is now.  

Since my diagnosis, has my life changed? Dam right it has!! I am the same person I always have been, only I look at life differently and the things life has to offer.  I don’t take things for granted anymore.  Everything is a blessing to me and I appreciate more of the small things in life.  

My goal now is to step out of that comfort zone and let my voice be heard.  Share with others,  how even being ill with MS, we can choose our path in life, have goals.

I want to show others and those who are ill that things knock us down and stand in our way of our plans.   But no matter what, we don't have to give up on our future dreams we have but, that we might have to compromise on how to reach those goals !  We need to trust that along the way we will learn more then we ever expected and become better people, with our journey with rougher roads and experiences.  

March is MS Awareness Month.  I look forward to stepping out and stepping up and sharing and teaching what I have learned that MS is like to live with.  Help people understand what MS is and most of all what it is not.  Please give to the MS Research and lets find a way to stop this monster at his first appearance. 

YouTube Channel!

Welcome to my YouTube Channel
Please take a moment and visit my channel.  I try to keep all my videos 5 minutes or less.  All topics are to my attitude and dealing with MS.  Hope you enjoy the positive outlook I have and share. I am not a doctor.  I am just sharing what I have learned that helps me.
 Your comments are appreciated. Thanks!

Beautiful Winters Day

I decided after my funky side affects of skiing the other day, that MS through at me, that my thoughts where that maybe snow shoeing may be a little easier on my self today.  I am not sure yet if i have over done it today. My body lets me know within 24 hours if I over exerted myself, bye the MS symptoms that a pear from no where. Like Saturday evening I was overwhelmed and had off and on vision blurriness and was totally existed yesterday.

Today, I did push myself to go snow shoeing.  With the sun shining and it being such a beautiful day out, I had to at lest go for a short adventure. Plus, I thought it would also give my dogs some well needed exercise.  I was sure they would burn some of that energy they had wading in the snow. I was right.  They are all now sleeping curled up by the wood stove!

The beauty of the sun shining through the fresh fallen snow on the trees, I couldn't help myself but to take pictures!  The beauty of nature.  The sound of the dried leaves on the trees blowing in the wind was music to my ears. Isn't it funny how once we get sick and so much has been taken from us, that we some how enjoy the little things in life that we use to take for granted.  I am feeling blessed that I am able to still do the outdoor activities that I enjoyed so much as a young teen. 

Even though I do find it difficult and take many breaks, I know I will physically benefit from pushing my limits, when the warmer months come. Experiencing from winters in the past, not only will I loose some weight but my flexibility, balance and endurance will be improved by then. I am feeling how difficult it has become from over doing it last winter and fulling short on my plan to build myself up. I am determined that this year will not be a repeat of that.  

Once I feel a little more confidant that I can invite some others to join me.  My daughter Sharmaine was my snow shoe buddy a few years back while she lived at home.  Last winter I did manage to get out with my nabour who loves snow shoeing as well.  For the time being pacing myself and getting through the struggles of a new activity always makes me feel I must do in private.  Maybe its the venerability of allowing others to actually see my struggles is uncomfortable for me.  As a woman who started working in the construction field when woman where not excepted in a male dominated work profession.  Now it is no big deal seeing woman excelling in this area. Maybe it's a little of my pride/ego too.

I have posted a few pictures of the beauty I experienced today on my adventure though our property. Until next time.... Never Give Up and know Its' Never too late.....

2015 Playing It Forward

Today I managed to push myself out the door and went Cross Country Skiing, despite the is cool  weather being -12'C w/Wind Chills being -18!. Warmer then it has been mind you.  As this is the first time in 2 years!  The snow is deep and I am thankful my dogs went in front of me following a privies broken trail, to make it much easier for me.  It still was a hard leg workout, however I managed without falling. I feel very proud of myself and is a great accomplishment  being my balance has been slightly off.
My legs are sore and I am hoping my after workout drink replenishes my muscles. I have added a scoop of creatine to also help prevent tomorrows soreness of my activity.  I was only out there for 30 minutes, but seems much longer.  It feels good to get out and do something that I use to love doing as a child growing up.

It has been 3 hours since I have came in to rest.  Hoping that I have not over done it as I am feeling head pressure and my eyes hurt as well as pulsing/twitching. That is okay, I do know its just the MS monster within that is trying to stop me from moving once again.

Looking out as I write this now, it appears I went at the right time of the day, as the wind is blowing trees and are waving and blowing the snow off the branches.

Until Next Time.  Never Give Up and its never too late.....

Soon a good bye to 2014

WOW! I can't believe it’s been almost a year since my last post! Seems to be the way it goes! Summer months are the hardest on me.  This past year (2014), has really dragged on.  I have really been fighting to keep my Monster In His Box!  It really has been a constant struggle.

As I type  I am thinking about the year that has past. I have found new ways to look at living my life. I have a new attitude maybe learned from the books I have read as well as my daily life’s struggles.  Reminiscing over this past year, brings thoughts of the people that have passed, those who have came back into my life, as well as those that are new aquittances, making my year better and hopeful in looking at the new year that approaches. Hoping to put the new learned things into action.

Although I have experienced medium exasperations and fatigue, off and on thought out this time, I have still got a good report from my Nero regarding my MS.  I have the plans of starting a new approach to my eating.  A Dr Terry Wahls has finally published her Wahls Protocol Book this year in USA, soon to be released in Canada.  I however not only have purchased and downloaded a copy from IBook but also ITunes so I can lesson to the audio version. This is very exciting for me as it promotes a new way of healthy eating, Polio style and active living. The only concern is its wheat, sugar and dairy free.  I have done the sugar and gluten free years before I was diagnosed but the thought of giving up Milk and Cheese.  Now that, I will be a challenge!

Now to you as my reader, I do plan to share more of this journey through out this year.  I have tried to rearrange things to hope share what works for me.